Nobody Likes the Gunner

"Words from a wise man's mouth are gracious, but a fool is consumed by his own lips...and the fool multiplies words." Ecclesiastes 10:12, 14

Every first year law school class has a student that earns the nickname "the Gunner."  Nobody wants to be the gunner and nobody likes the gunner.  He (or she) is the first one to raise their hand when a question is asked, the first one that wants to ask a question, and the person who always states facts and information related to class that no one else knows.  This person gives the appearance that they are going to hurt our grading curve.  (Law school classes are graded on a mandatory B curve.  Yes, 1 exam and a forced B curve makes getting A's really hard!) Anyway, after the end of the first year, everyone is often surprised to learn that the gunner didn't do as well on exams as one would think.  As it turns out, the gunner is just full of it and tries to make himself look good.  And in the end, the gunner is a fool.

Sadly, the gunner concept is not foreign inside the church.  I've been to many Bible studies that have a gunner as well.  And for some reason, the gunner is usually a woman.  She's a talker and has stories that she believes illustrate EVERY point of group discussion.  Little does she know that everyone is excited when she doesn't show up!!! 

Ecclesiastes reminds us to restrain our speech.  The fool is the person who talks too much and doesn't have a mute button.  If the fool's brain thinks it, for some reason his mouth speaks it too.  The word filter just doesn't work.  He shares too much too often and at some point his examples and stories lose their effectiveness.  People start to realize that the image that the words portray isn't real. 

I have a rule for group Bible studies that I will only answer 1 or maybe 2 questions.  Thus, I read all the questions in advance and think about where I can contribute the best.  Sometimes I don't share at all if the gunner doesn't let me.  But either way, my speech is restrained.

I'm learning that I need to have this same approach to words in my every day life at home.  With texting and social networking, we use far more words than we realize.  (Hence the fact I'm not on Facebook--waste of time and words.)  My husband may not believe it, but I'm going to work on word reduction this week--fewer phone calls, fewer texts, and less talking.  Hopefully my words will be more gracious and uplifting.  And hopefully I will never have gunner status.

Lessons From My Mom

I’ll never forget my first science fair project.  My problem was “What is the best way to clean up an oil spill on water?”  That fourth grade project was where I really learned about my mother.  It didn’t take long for me to realize that school projects were going to be harder than I thought.  My mom actually wanted me to measure and carefully cut out the pieces of my project.  I had to use a certain type of glue so that my presentation board wasn’t lumpy.   I had to type my project, because handwritten work didn’t look professional.  I had to memorize my presentation, because judges wanted me to know what I was talking about.   I had to display and present an experiment that actually worked.   And I had to use Bible verses appropriately to support my project.  My mother was a perfectionist, and she expected me to do my best.

As it turned out, my mother was right about my project.   I not only won my fourth grade science fair, but I also placed very high at the state regional science fair.  And in fifth grade, I had another winning project at the district and state levels.  It wasn’t because I was the smartest student in my class or because I was the best orator.  And it certainly wasn’t because I had the most unique project.  Instead, it was because my mother invested time and effort into helping me become successful.  She certainly didn’t do my projects for me.  Instead, she guided me, supported me through the process, and taught me some very important life lessons.

My mom taught me that I have to do my best in everything that I do.  She taught me that if I do a task right the first time, I never have to repeat it.  She taught me that I should always go above and beyond what I’m asked to do.  She taught me that if I wanted to do something bad enough, I could find a way to get it done.  And she demonstrated to me that I must pray about and commit what I’m doing to the Lord.

I’ve had quite a few projects since my fourth grade science fair project, and my mother has been there to support and guide me through each task.  She fed me and did my laundry during nursing school.  She helped me plan my wedding.  She encouraged me to go to law school and made sure that I met my deadlines.  She cleaned my house and took care of me during pregnancy.  She watched and loved my babies while I finished school.  And she’s prayed for me every step of the way.

I am very blessed to have my mother.  She’s my cheerleader, my role model, and my best friend.  I hope that I can instill some of her lessons in my children someday.  I wish every girl could be blessed to have a mom like mine.

Kentucky Derby Day

photo by Pat Lang Photography

What a blessed day!  We celebrated a birthday today, watched a friend's little league game, ate some wonderful fried chicken, and watched the Kentucky Derby.  I've been to Lexington, Kentucky before, but I've never been lucky enough to witness the Kentucky Derby live.  This is something I want to do someday.  Don't ask me why, but it's probably related to the big hats.  And yes, our American girls do hats much better than girls in the UK.  Straw and feathers beat the fascinators any day.

Anyway, in honor of our famous Kentucky Derby, I wanted to share one of my favorite recipes.  It's for Kentucky Derby Pie.  If you like pie and you also like chocolate chip cookies, this recipe is for you.

Ingredients
1 stick margarine, melted
1 cup sugar
1/2 cup flour
2 eggs
1/2 cup chocolate chips
1/2 cup butterscotch chips
1 tsp vanilla
pie shell

Mix together and pour into unbaked pie shell.  Bake in oven heated at 350 degrees for exactly 30 minutes.  Enjoy.  Then you'll know another reason why I love the KY Derby!  Oh, and congratulations to Animal Kingdom!

My Mission Statement

"You, my [sisters], were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the sinful nature; rather, serve one another in love." Galatians 5:13

The personality tests have revealed that I am an uptight, type A person.  But I never realized how embarrassingly anal I am until I decided that I needed a plan  for this next phase of my life.  I function well when I have established goals and objectives to meet my goals.  I know, it sounds like I run my life like a business.  You haven't seen my daily planner...

Yesterday was a milestone for me.  When I hit the send button at 4 o'clock yesterday, I officially turned in my last law school project, thus completing the 87 credit hours and 30 community service hours that I need to graduate from law school.  For the first time ever, I have no external commitments (other than church) in my life.  I am finally free. 

Now, I have to figure out what to do with myself.  Trust me, an organized planner cannot just live day to day without a mission statement.  So I sought out a verse that I could use to inspire me.  And Galatians 5:13 is perfect.  I am truly free from external constraints of work and school, but I need to make it my mission to not waste my time and indulge in sinful pursuits.  I can't be the high maintenance housewife who pampers herself and runs around town with her girl friends getting into trouble.  Instead, I need to use my time to serve others.

This isn't just my calling as a mother.  As a believer in Jesus Christ I am no longer enslaved to the world or to the ritualistic rules of religion either.  Jesus has given me the gift of freedom, and He wants me to use it to serve others.  What a great mission!  If you're a believer, please consider the gift of the freedom you have too.  It's amazing to be free at last.  Now, let's not ruin a good thing.

Accepting Trouble

"...Yet another messenger came and said, 'Your sons and daughters were feasting and drinking wine at the oldest brother's house, when suddenly a mighty wind swept in from the desert and struck the four corners of the house. It collapsed on them and they are all dead'...His wife said to him, 'Are you still holding on to your integrity? Curse God and die!' He replied, 'You are talking like a foolish woman.  Shall we accept good from God, and not trouble?' In all this, Job did not sin in what he said."  Job 2:18-19, 9-10

photo cutesy of NSSL

Last week some awful winds swept through the South.  Now, towns and neighborhoods are completely gone.  Listening to the stories of the survivors and hearing about all the people who didn't make it is just heart wrenching.  I mean, when a tornado hits, there's not much you can do.  It chooses its own path and the people are at its mercy.

As I was reading my Bible today, I was struck by the fact that Job's children died at the mercy of the wind, which collapsed their house.  The news of their deaths must have been devastating for Job.  Much like some of the people in Alabama, the man lost everything.  Yet when he had the chance to moan and groan and feel sorry for himself, he didn't.  Instead, he explained that we have to be willing to accept the good and the bad. 

What amazing faith!  I know there are days when I seem to have trouble accepting the good from God.  Having to accept the bad is scary.  But God didn't leave Job in the gutter. At the end of his story it says that "After Job had prayed for his friends, the Lord made him prosperous again and gave him twice as much as he had before...The Lord blessed the latter part of Job's life more than the first." (Job 42:10, 12)  This isn't God's promise that everyone who struggles is going to get rich.  Instead, this story serves as a reminder that if we trust God and accept the good with the bad and maintain that testimony, God will honor that.

Let's not forget to pray for those in Alabama.  And let's remember to thank God for the good and the bad in our own lives.

Where are the Trees?

Have you ever cleaned up your DVR by deleting old recorded ball games or strange documentaries that your husband recorded off the Military channel?  Well, I used to be nervous about erasing shows off my DVR until I realized that my husband is not that worried about it.  If a show has been on the DVR for about 48 hours, it's fair game to be deleted. But my son has a completely different view about his shows.  Keep in mind that my son is only 2 years old.

My son is obsessed with Sid the Science Kid. Personally, I rather like Sid.  Every day he goes to preschool and learns about a new science concept.  And my little boy learns right along with him.  It was pretty incredible when I realized that my little guy new the colors of the rainbow--in order (Red, Orange, Yellow, Green, Blue, Indigo, Violet).  There's something about a 2 year old saying "indigo" that cracks me up.  Anyway, this is a great show that I support and it's sooooo much better than Sesame Street.  Growing up I wasn't allowed to watch Sesame Street because it was "overstimulating."  If you've ever tried to watch it, you'll understand what my mother meant by that term. Sorry, I regress...

So being the forward thinking mother that I am, I got smart and programmed my DVR to record Sid every morning at 8:30 am on PBS.  This idea worked beautifully.  For some reason little people like to watch their shows multiple times in a day, so having it recorded on the DVR really helped me entertain my little guy while I studied. 

Well, he got spoiled.  He realized that his favorite episodes were available whenever he wanted.  So for a few weeks we watched the rainbow show every day.  Then we watched the inertia show every day.  And then, I think he liked the water show.  Regardless, we ended up with about 20 unwatched episodes on the DVR that were just taking up space.  So I smartly reviewed the shows and deleted the ones that he never asked for and the ones that I wasn't as interested in--like the recycling show, the pollution show, etc. (I'm not really into the Green movement.)

And then it happened. The next day, my little guy requested the Tree episode.  Of course we didn't still have that episode because it was one of the Green episodes that I erased!  I tried my best lawyer's persuading argument and he still refused to watch any other show that was still on my DVR!  And he cried. 

Today, Sid was about a tree stump and animal habitats and I knew that it had to be THE ONE.  So I called him out to show him the preview and he this is what he said, "The tree one is a good one.  This is not a good one."  But being visibly upset, he still sat down and watched.

I guess the moral to the story is to be careful when deleting your DVR.  Or maybe don't let your kids know that you record their shows.  Or maybe you should never delete the trees!

Into the Unknown

I guess I'm a little insecure about this new chapter in my life.  It sounds silly, but school has been a security blanket for the last four years and now I feel like I'm venturing into the unknown.  I was feeling sorry for myself and crying today as I was driving to school for the last time,  and I heard this song.  The words were a huge encouragement to me.  I hope they bless you too.

You look around
It's staring back at you
Another wave of doubt
Will it pull you under
You wonder

What if I'm overtaken
What if I never make it
What if no one's there?
Will you hear my prayer?

When you take that first step
Into the unknown
You know that He won't let you go

Chorus:

So what are you waiting for?
What do you have to lose?
Your insecurities try to hold to you

You know you're made for more
So don't be afraid to move
Your faith is all
It takes and you can
Walk on the water too

Verse 2:
So get out
And let
Your fear fall to the ground
No time to waste
Don't wait
Don't you turn around and miss out
Everything you were made for
I know you're not sure
So you play it safe
Try to run away

If you take that first step
Into the unknown
He won't let you go

(chorus)

Bridge:
(step out)
Even when a storm hits
(step out)
Even when you're broken
(step out)
Even when your heart is telling you telling you to give up
(step out)
When your hope is stolen
(step out)
You can't see where you're going
You don't have to be afraid

So what are you waiting,
What are you waiting for?

So what are you waiting for?
What do you have to lose?
Your insecurities try to hold to you

You know you're made for more
So don't be afraid to move
Your faith is all
It takes and you can
Walk on the water...
Walk on the water too

 

Walk on the Water Too by Britt Nicole

Holiday Alert: Reminder to Get Mom's Gift

It's about that time of year again--Mother's Day!  It's that holiday that is so easy to forget because it creeps up on you, but if you do forget it you're in big trouble.  Since moms spend 364 days a year worrying about everyone else's problems, it's nice to have a day to relax and be indulged.  Ok, that's not really what happens on Mother's Day, but if it did, it would be nice.  So this year, let's honor the moms in our lives and let them know that we are thinking about them and appreciate them.

The key to Mother's Day shopping is to show your Mom that you put thought into your gift.  Every good Mom will appreciate the effort.  Just don't forget that the clock is ticking.  You have until Sunday to find something for that wonderful lady in your life.  And FYI--don't make her cook!

Predictably Faithful--Even at Home

"He who is faithful in a very little thing is faithful also in much; and he who is unrighteous in a very little thing is unrighteous also in much." Luke 16:10

 You know that question that human resource people like to ask in an interview, "What is your greatest strength?" I hate this question.  But I have a really great answer. I say, "I'm dependable. If I tell you I'm going to do something I will make sure it gets done." Interviewers eat this up.  You know why?  Because it's hard to find dependable people.

And it's really hard to accomplish anything with people who don't keep their word.  You know, the people who never show up on time; the people who don't actually call you when they say they will; the people who "forget" what they agreed to do.  These are the people who drop the ball on the little things so that you never want to trust them with something really big.

Even though I've always been a reliable employee in the workplace or at church, sometimes I do drop the ball on the little things.  I forget that keeping my word at home is just as important as keeping my word with my boss.  I need to remember that my word matters--even at home!  If I tell my husband that I'll take out the trash, I need to do it--today.  If I assure my son that he can help me make brownies, I need to make sure that he has that opportunity.  If I make an appointment at the doctor's office, I need to show up at the time I agreed upon.  And if I tell someone I'll call them, I actually need to pick up the phone and do it.

Luke reminds us that faithful people don't drop the ball when it comes to the little things.  They're meticulous and reliable.  They are predictable.  Isn't this the kind of testimony you want?  I know that I want be described as faithful. Let's start taking our words seriously and make sure our actions match up to our words--even at home.

Leah's Love Story

"Now the Lord saw that Leah was unloved and He opened her womb...Leah conceived and bore a son and named him Reuben, for she said, 'because the Lord has seen my affliction; surely now my husband will love me.' Then she bore a son and said 'because the Lord has heard that I am unloved, He has therefore given me this son also'... She conceived again and bore a son and said, Now this time my husband will become attached to me, because I have borne him three sons'.. And she conceived again and bore a son and said, 'This time I will praise the Lord.' Therefore she named him Judah." Genesis 29:31-35

 I've read the story of Jacob and Leah many times before. And each time is just as depressing as the last.  I mean, this poor girl helps her Dad deceive Jacob and as a result ends up married to a man who never loves her.  To make matters worse, Jacob also marries her sister, Rachel, and he completely adores Rachel.  This story just seems like every girl's worst nightmare.

Pastor Brandon pointed out something about this passage that I never noticed before.  When Reuben, Simeon, and Levi are born, Leah makes the statement that she hopes Jacob will take notice and love her.  She's actually having babies to make her husband notice her.  Unfortunately, it appears that Jacob's just using her as a baby momma.

By the time she has her fourth boy things appear to have changed.  When Judah, her youngest is born, she says "This time I will praise the Lord."  She no longer mentions her husband, but instead praises God.  It's almost as if she realizes that Jacob will never live up to her expectations and love her the way she wants to be loved.  So instead, she focuses on God. Isn't this a beautiful love story? 

I'm sure we all know people who got married for the wrong reasons.  Girls who got married because they were desperate to have a life companion.  Or guys who married girls so that they could have a personal maid and cook.  There are the couples who got married because they got pregnant.  And there are even people who got married because they thought they were in love.  But once the honeymoon is over and life happens, these marriages end up on the rocks and people start to wonder if they will ever find true happiness inside their marriage again.

Leah's story is a reminder that we can all be loved the way we want to be if we focus on the One who loves us the most.  God wants us to receive His love and to experience the fullness of His grace.  When we seek our happiness from Him, our marriages will fall into place.

As for Leah, God honored her and sent Jesus Christ to be born to the descendants of Judah.  God fulfilled her when Jacob could not.  What an encouragement to all married persons!  Let's all learn a lesson from Leah's love story. Let's all remember to seek God and to rely on Him to bring love and happiness to our marriages.