Train Pieces

 Grapevine (TX) Vintage RR.

The other night, my boys were riding in the car with my husband and they discussed their favorite topic--trains.  Since Burlington Northern Santa Fe Railway has it's headquarters near where we live, we have train tracks everywhere.  For little boys who love trains, we live in the best location.  We literally get to go under or over tracks just about every time we leave our house.  This typically leads to cheering and excitement from our back seat.

Anyway, my boys were discussing trains the other night with my husband when they came across a piece of track that had no barricade or flashing lights.  This troubled my oldest son.  He couldn't figure out why this part of the track didn't have a barricade.  When he builds his train tracks at home, he always includes barricades around the crossing areas.

After a few minutes, he apparently figured out the answer to his question.  He said, "Daddy, maybe God just ran out of pieces!"

Although I recognize that we have some theology to work on here, it does make me happy that my son realizes that God is not only our Creator, but also the One who is in control.  And I'm sure my son will be happy when he finally comes to understand that God never runs out of pieces.

Talking to a Mommy-to-be

“If you can’t say something nice… don’t say nothin’ at all.”

~Thumper, from Disney’s Bambi

Sometimes I think pregnancy turns me into a "touchy" person. I wouldn't say that I'm more sensitive when I'm pregnant, because I don't cry or get more emotional while pregnant. Instead, I've noticed that pregnancy seems to make me more defensive. For awhile, I was worried that some hormonal happenings were changing me. But I think I've become convinced that OTHER PEOPLE can be insensitive and rude, thus causing my motherly hackles to rise.

This phenomenon, of course, has made me rethink how I treat other women when I'm not pregnant. I really hope that I haven't offended other mommies-to-be in the past, so I'm creating rules to follow in the future. Based on my experiences as a pregnant woman (x3), here are my rules for making mothers-to-be feel good.

1) If a mommy-to-be tells you about her pregnancy ailments, DO NOT proceed to tell her how wonderful and snappy your pregnancy was. She doesn't care and just assumes that you're bragging. She wants to hear how miserable you were--misery always loves company.

2) Remember that baby's gender is outside of the mommy's control. So don't ever act disappointed or sad when discussing her baby's gender or potential gender. Just because a mommy has 2 boys doesn't mean that she wouldn't be as thrilled with 3 boys as she would be with 2 boys and a girl. Mommies need to love all their children, so celebrate a baby of any gender!

3) If a mommy registers for something that you are sure she doesn't need, don't tell her. There's so much baby stuff out there and new moms don't have a clue. I would have loved to have had another new mom share her insight on baby items, but no one did. So for my first baby, I just registered for what sounded good. Mommies can always make returns.

4) Don't ever make a condescending remark about a mommy's choice of nursery decor or baby gear. If you don't like something, keep your mouth shut. And if you think some baby clothes are ridiculous, who cares--it's not your kid. Most mommies dream of preparing for a baby, so let them enjoy it.

5) Don't share 50 million stories of what other mommies or mommies-to-be are doing. Pregnancy and parenting are journeys that we should all get to experience for ourselves. If we want advice, we usually seek it. Unsolicited advice from others makes us think that you don't approve of what we're doing.

6) Remember that all decisions related to delivery, breastfeeding, circumsicion, etc. are between the mommy and daddy and their doctor. It's none of your business. Pressuring a mommy to make a decision one way or the other causes unnecessary stress. And judging a mommy for the decision that she does make doesn't accomplish anything (but it does create enemies).

7) Be encouraging. Remind mommies that it's going to be ok if they have to have an epidural, or a c-section or an unexpected unmedicated delivery. Remind mommies that very few deliveries go as planned and yet everything still usually works out. DO NOT share horror stores from L & D prior to a mom's delivery. Save that for when she can share her story with you too.

8) Be supportive of however a mommy decides to parent (unless she's doing something that could obviously harm her baby). If she wants to use cloth diapers, let her. If she doesn't want to make her own baby food, don't judge her. And if she has to go back to work in 6 weeks and needs someone else to watch her baby, don't say anything to induce mommy-guilt.

I have met many, many mommies who I think are slightly crazy for some of their pregnancy and parenting decisions. But I've learned that the "to each her own policy" is a great rule. Just because I have a completely different parenting style doesn't make me better. And just because another mommy gets all her advice from some nutty book doesn't mean she'll be bad. I think most mommies are wired with pretty good maternal instincts. Thus, 3rd party commentary that isn't positive and supportive doesn't accomplish much.

So when it comes to conversing with mommies, remember that amazing rule that we all learned years ago from Bambi, "if you can't say something nice...don't say nothin' at all."

Time to Eat More Chicken

Just a reminder that today is August 1!  Per Governor Huckabee's request, today is the day to support your local Chick-Fil-A stores.  Let's remind the business community that it's ok to support Christian values and morals.  We live in a country where we're supposed to be given the right to speak freely.  So lets show our appreciation for this right by eating more chicken today. Happy Chick-Fil-A Day!

Time to Make the Birth Plan

So I'm officially past the half way point in my pregnancy (21+ weeks), and I'm to that point where I have to start thinking about planning for delivery and all the details associated with the birth plan.  A lot of my mommy friends are obsessed with parenting and birthing books when it comes to getting advice for making these decisions.  Some are consumed by the concept of doing everything "natural." While others have declared that they want the least painful approach to childbirth as possible.  All I can say to my friends is this: to each her own.  My personal goal in choosing a birth method is to do what is safest for my baby.

As a nurse attorney who has spent most of the last 3 years working in medical malpractice, I have my own unique perspective on child birth.  It seems that every month or so I get a new birth injury case across my desk.   I have seen a trend among these cases.  Too often something went wrong somewhere, somebody wasn't paying good enough attention, and the caregiver waited way too long to do a c-section, which if performed earlier would have prevented the birth injury and associated complications.  Based on the evidence in these cases (and my personal observations while rotating through L & D in nursing school), C-sections are not the horrible, unnecessary, monstrous procedures that many women view them to be.  In many cases, the c-section is the difference between a baby with brain damage vs. a healthy baby. 

My first delivery was a necessary and urgent c-section in light of some blood pressure and kidney problems I was experiencing.  But the 2nd time around, the ball was in my court and I was given the option of a repeat C-section or a VBAC.  In light of my experience with birth injury cases, I actually consulted one of my firm's medical experts to help me make my decision.  He said that the safest decision I could make for my baby was to deliver him via C-section.  Subsequently, I consulted other professionals on the matter who all agreed that there is no medical advantage to a VBAC.  Thus, I chose the safety first method and had a repeat C-section.  Ultimately this turned out to be a great decision since there was meconium in my water when it spontaneously broke at home.  A quicker delivery turned out to be a good thing for my baby.

This time around, I'm sticking with the decision to choose the safest delivery for my baby. I can honestly say that I don't feel the guilt and grief that other mothers do about not ever having a natural or pain-med free delivery.  For the life of me, I can't figure out why this bothers women.  I mean, I've never heard anyone complain about having their wisdom teeth removed under general anesthesia or having to have a surgical appendectomy.  So this whole mommy guilt that people feel about their deliveries is crazy.  Mommies should realize that the bottom line is this: your goal should be to deliver a healthy and happy baby.  Some mommies do this naturally. Some mommies do this with epidurals. And some mommies do this with surgery.  But regardless of how you deliver, you can still be an awesome mommy.

Praying for Him

Have you ever noticed that some people are hard to pray for?   It's not that you don't want to pray for that person, but sometimes you don't know how to go about praying for that person.   Or maybe you pray for that person frequently, but you kind of pray the same thing every day.  I've noticed that it's really easy to fall into this rut when you're praying for family members.

Our church started a prayer system this spring, and I've found it extremely helpful.  The men of our church have been praying for their wives, and us wives have been praying for our husbands with the assistance of websites: http://www.prayingforher.com/ and http://www.prayingforhim.com/. Both websites are sponsored by the National Prayer Room.  And when you sign up for the program, you are sent a daily challenge and scripture to help guide your prayers for your spouse for that day. 

I haven't quite finished my 31 day challenge, but my husband (who started his prayer program a month before I even knew about it) says that you can continue the prayer emails after the first month for free (although you might be asked for an optional donation at that point--just thought I'd warn you). 

Anyway, if you're looking for a way to spice up your prayer life or just want to pray for your spouse differently than you have been praying, consider starting your own 31 day program.  We've enjoyed discussing our prayer assignments together and have really appreciated the accountability. 

Daddy's Project

I just have to brag on my husband a little bit.  We found out 3 weeks ago that we're having a little girl, and he's already got her room ready to go!  He spent his 4th of July break transforming my nautical boy nursery to a girly room.  Not only did he do a fabulous job, but he also managed to paint straight, colorful stripes on one textured nursery wall (you know, the kind of wall that paint tape doesn't stick to very well). 

We've got a few more projects for this room before Baby G comes, but if she decided to show up sooner rather than later, she definitely has her own space now.  Yeah for Daddy!

Thank You, Thank You, Thank You

I'm almost to the half way point of this pregnancy, and it's been a rough few months.  I certainly couldn't have accomplished half of what I've done (which honestly isn't that much) without the help of my family.  So today, I just wanted to say Thank You to everyone who has aided me in some way.

Thank you to my my mom for helping me with housework, laundry, and for painting my nursery.  Thanks to my dad for helping us fix things around the house.  Thanks to my father-in-law for saving the day when my fence collapsed.  Thanks to my mother-in-law for helping with housework.  Thanks to both my parents and in-laws for all of your babysitting services. Thanks to my grandparents for helping organize and clean the little boys' room, cleaning my kitchen, and helping me sort through boxes of baby boy clothes.  Thank you to my little boys for becoming little helpers too.  And especially, thank you to my wonderful husband for being an awesome team player.  Not only have you jumped in and helped with all the housework, but you've gone above and beyond by helping with meals, hiring a lawn service, and working super hard to get the nursery transformed into a beautiful little girl's space. 

Most importantly, thank you to my dear friends and family for all of your prayers.  My Heavenly Father has been helping me get through each day and He's given me relief when I've needed it.  I have been blessed with a sweet baby girl, a wonderful and supportive family, a skilled physician, and a Great Provider who is always there. 

I know that I'll have to say thank you many more times to all of you before this pregnancy is over, but I just wanted you all to know that I appreciate you and love you all!

The Newest Supreme Court Ruling

http://mydailyclarity.com/2010/03/healthcare-debate-demonstrates-the-failings-of-us-governance/

I'm guessing that you've probably heard by now, but if you haven't, the Supreme Court has finally ruled on the Obama Health Care bill. And yes, SCOTUS (the Supreme Court of the United States) has found the individual mandate to be Constitutional.

In the news, there's been lots of discussion about the Constitutionality of the individual mandate under the tax power vs. Commerce Clause vs. other clauses.  In plain English for those of you who haven't endured hours of Constitutional law, the Court ultimately found that the individual mandate is valid as a tax under Congress's taxing power (which really does exist in the Constitution.)

Do I agree with this finding?  No.  I mean, our President has repeatedly stated that the individual mandate is NOT a tax, so to interpret it as a tax just doesn't make sense.  (Although, notwithstanding the President's own statements, the taxing power really was the best argument that the government had in this case.)  That said, I don't like being told that I have to buy something.  Nor do I like being taxed out my ears.  It just doesn't seem very American.

And now the fun begins.  Over the next months and years, the health care debate is going to ignite into something fierce.  Today may be disappointing for many, but this fight is a long way from being over.  Stay tuned for lots of excitement.

I know that this isn't my typical blog post topic, but I kind of felt like I should at least acknowledge the monumental decision that was passed down today.  A few weeks ago, I took an oath to defend the Constitution of the United States.  And I guess I feel obligated to engage in discussions about our beloved document and how it is wrongly or rightly interpreted.  If any of you are interested in the taxing power or the Commerce Clause or the Constitution itself, I would encourage you to take the free Constitution class offered online from Hillsdale College or call me and I can loan you my Heritage Guide to the Constitution.  Why should you do this?  Because it looks like every single American really is going to be forced to pay a tax for health care.  Now the law is going to personally touch you.

Raising a Southern Belle

 
It's only been 48 hours since I've become consciously aware of the fact that I'm no longer going to be just a Boy Mom, but also a Girl Mom.  I've always heard people say that boys are so much easier, and I think I already know why.

For the last 48 hours, I've in-store and online shopped trying to find the perfect little girl outfits, bedding, and nursery decor.  Don't get me wrong, I certainly did my homework when trying to prepare for little boys, but the process wasn't stressful--and not nearly as expensive. 

I still can't believe that little girls need so much STUFF!  I mean, I'm sure you could provide for a little girl with the bare minimum, but to raise a true Southern belle is lots more work.  She can't just have a onesie and pants.  Oh no!  She needs the dress, the bloomers, the tights, the shoes, the matching hair bow, and a matching sweater or jacket.  And did you know that most stores don't sell all of these items?  (If you know the secret to finding good tights and shoes for a reasonable price, please share!!!) 

Anyway, being a Girl Mom is already hard work--and my little girl won't even be officially joining us for another 5 months!  I can't even imagine how crazy our future is going to be.  But I have to confess that Dear Husband and I are thrilled to be transforming our nursery from a blue nautical haven to a pink and lime green heaven.  And I'm really excited about Baby G's expanding designer wardrobe full of pinks and reds.  (Thanks Grandma, for helping get our Juicy collection started!)

There's just something about raising a girl that's different from raising boys.  There seems to be this extra pressure to make sure that the little girl is raised to be girly and proper.  Or maybe it's the Boy Mom in me hoping that I don't mess up the little girl by raising her with two messy and rough older brothers.  It's possible that most girl moms don't have a clue what I'm talking about.  But somehow, I think that there are some Southern Mamas who understand precisely how hard it is to raise a true Southern Belle!

Her Baby Shoes

I should know better than to argue with a 3 year old, but I've been arguing with my son for the past 3 months.  He has insisted that he is going to have a little sister.  He's also been telling people that he has picked out a name for her.  Of course, every time he tells people this, I have to explain that we don't know if we're having a girl and if we are, we're actually naming her something a little different from what he's calling her.  It has been quite the ordeal.

But now the verdict is in.  The doctor has confirmed our suspicions and we now know the truth.  The doctor was so confident in his findings that he said I could share the news with everyone. Drum roll please... We are officially having a GIRL!

I think my husband and I stared at each other in shock for most of our lunch today.  We had absolutely prepared ourselves for the possibility having scored a hat trick with 3 boys.  We were also prepared to go to war over the naming rights of our little guy.  And now it seems like everything has changed.  For better or worse, we're getting ready to enter the world of little girls. 

We've decided to stick with G names, so if you notice me blogging about Baby G, that's because her name will start with a G.  My 3 year old informed me this afternoon that he would be calling his sister by a certain G name that he likes.  When I told him that her actual name would be different, he replied that I could call her by the name that I like and he would call her by his favorite name.  Go figure.  Now that he knows that he's been right about his sister for the past 3 months, I'm never going to be able to convince him that he's wrong about her again.  He's still gloating.  I'm still in shock.  And we're all looking forward to adding some pink into our lives.

To find more shoes like the ones in the picture above, go to http://lemonadecouture.com/.