The Color of Rain

Last Friday, I sat on my bed and sobbed.  I wasn't actually sad.  I just made the mistake of watching a horribly sad movie and reading a gut wrenchingly sad book at the same time.  (I was reading during commercial breaks.)  It just so happens that the movie was about a 2 year old who dies of cancer.  And the book was about a father who dies of cancer and a mother who dies of a brain tumor.  Between the three tragedies, I felt like I was at a funeral.

Death is not something that I enjoy.  During nursing school, I had the unfortunate opportunity to watch a man die of a stroke (didn't respond to a code) and to witness another man in the process of dying who said goodbye to his grandchildren.  Right then and there, I made up my mind that I would never work in an environment where I had to deal with dying patients and their families.  Hence, I chose pediatric orthopedics--a practice where the patients typically get fixed and sent home in better condition than when they were admitted to the hospital.  Maybe I was immature, but dealing with grieving people was not something I wanted to do at the age of 22.  I guess I have too much sympathy for other people--if that's even possible. 

For some reason, when I heard Michael and Gina Spehn on the radio talking about the book they had written about the deaths of their former spouses and the resulting combination of their two families (the Spehns are the modern Brady Bunch), I felt compelled to read the book.  The Color of Rain: How Two Families Found Faith, Hope, & Love in the Midst of Tragedy turned out to be a beneficial book for me.  Although I sobbed half way through it, I learned a lot about a godly response to death and the grieving process.  Michael and Gina explain how those around them helped or could have helped during their time of grieving.  And they explain how faith makes death such a different experience for a Christian family than it does for the world.  They actually make death seem like a beautiful experience.

This book taught me how I need to approach death and how I should view it differently.  In addition, this book taught me ways that I can help those dealing with significant losses and who are grieving.  Apart from a nursing class on the appropriate way to handle a dead body, I don't think I've ever really been taught how to help those who grieve.  And I am grateful that Michael and Gina were willing to share their experience with me in this book.  Even though I have no plans to do hospice work anytime soon, as a result of reading this book, I now have a desire to "do something" for people who are grieving.

To learn more about how you can help those who are grieving, please visit Michael and Gina's website at http://www.michaelandgina.com/ or their nonprofit's website The New Day Foundation for Families at http://www.foundationforfamilies.com/ or get a copy of their book.  You'll probably cry.  But you'll be glad you did.