Life as I Know it is Over...

Life as I know it is over.  As I mourn the loss of normalcy in my house over the next few days, my husband couldn't be happier.  For the first time since last October, he's excited.  That's right ladies and gentlemen, today is Opening Day!

My Tivo is already set to start recording ball games from 2 pm to 10 pm tonight.  My husband will start wearing his Andrus jersey on a daily basis.  He'll start grilling hot dogs and hamburgers twice a week.  His sporadic trips to the batting cages will turn into weekly rituals.  Movie night will turn into excuses to watch Major League, Eight Men Out, and Field of Dreams.  And my baby will know the words to Take Me Out to the Ballgame by his first birthday.

Oh, don't feel sorry for me.  I signed up for this when I married a baseball player.  I knew that baseball fans are hardcore when I got married.  They're worse than football fans, because they don't have one game a week.  Baseball is EVERY night.  The fans are more dedicated than basketball fans, because they actually sit through 100 degree afternoons to watch their games.  And hockey fans?  Well, they're Canadian and that's about all I need to say...

Anyway, the Major League Baseball season starts today.  The Texas Rangers open their season tomorrow at home against the Red Sox at 3:05 pm.  My husband is soooo excited.  He told me that this week is like having Christmas and his birthday in the same week. (Good thing he didn't compare it to our anniversary.)  I guess this is a good thing. He's happy!  I guess it's time to sit back, catch some sun, and watch as the boys play ball!

Sisters are Doin' It

"Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes.  Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight.  for this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to make themselves beautiful.  They were submissive to their own husbands." I Peter 3:3-5

When I was in nursing school, I loved the Aretha Franklin/Eurythmics song Sisters are Doin' it for Themselves. Talk about perfect motivation for going to class and working hard to find a good job.  Here are some of the lyrics:

 Now there was a time
When they used to say
That behind every great man
There had to be a great woman

Oh in these times of change
You know that it's no longer true
So we're coming out of the kitchen
'Cause there's something
We forgot to say to you

We say, Sisters are doing it for themselves
Standing on their own two feet
And ringing on their own bells
Sisters are doing it for themselves

This is a song to celebrate
The conscious liberation
Of the female state

Mothers, daughters
And their daughters too, yeah
Woman to woman
We're singing with you

The inferior sex
Has got a new exterior, yeah
We got doctors, lawyers
Politicians too, ooh, hoo...

Yes, sisters are doing it for themselves and they're miserable.  I know female lawyers and law students who are lonely and divorced because of their careers. I know a female doctor who lived 3 hours away from her husband because she had to fulfill her career obligations.  I know lots of women who are having trouble conceiving children because they "were doin' it" and have waited too long to be parents.  Aretha Franklin forgot to tell us that sisters who "do it" might become liberated from men, but will also become slaves to misery.

I was raised in a Christian school, a Bible-teaching youth group, and by godly parents.  I've been taught to be a self-thinker, an independent person, and a leader.  But it's taken me a long time to understand what my role is as a woman.  The world doesn't glorify the woman of I Peter.  The church sends confusing messages about her.  And she's hard to find.

The Bible says that the feminist, cultural message is wrong.  A woman is supposed to have a gentle and quiet spirit (I Peter 3:4); she's supposed to fear God (Proverbs 31: 30); and she's supposed to be submissive (Ephesians 5:22).   God's Word doesn't say that a woman can't be a cattle rancher or a school teacher or a chef.  But if she does choose an occupation, she must have the character qualities described above.  She can be well-educated, have a well-developed talent, and enjoy hobbies, but she must still be a godly woman.

I know women like this too--women who are kind and gentle and godly.  I sent one an e-mail this morning thanking her for her example.  If you know a godly woman, thank her.  The world won't, but women who are Christ followers should.  I want to be the beautiful woman described in I Peter.  I want to live the life that God wants for me.  I just won't be doin' it for myself.

Perfect Summer Gear

Doesn't this look like the perfect summer for a little kid?  If only I had a place for all this cute gear!

To see more perfect summer gear for your kiddos, visit http://www.potterybarnkids.com/.

The Poor in a Box

"Listen, my dear brothers: Has not God chosen those who are poor in the eyes of the world to be rich in faith and to inherit the kingdom he promised whose who love him? But you have insulted the poor." James 2:5-6a

I think we try to put the poor in a box sometimes.  The poor people belong in the poor side of town.  The poor should go to the county hospitals.  The poor get their legal services from legal aid.  The poor have their own stores and their own resources. 

I have worked with poor people and it's really aggravating sometimes.  So many poor people don't seem to want out of their box.  They're content to wait for their welfare checks.  They keep having babies even though they don't have the resources to provide for them.  They think that the Christmas provider programs (Angel Tree) is going to be there for them every year.  Or, they completely reject the resources available to them at the expense of their own children.  They just won't help themselves!

We often categorize "the poor" as a political and sociological problem.  We blame welfare programs.  We blame single parents and the demise of culture.  We blame the economy.  But we forget that the poor have always been among us in some form.  Even in Bible times, there were poor people who needed help.

Jesus reached out to the poor.  He commands us to reach out to the poor.  And in James, believers are told that favoritism of the rich is forbidden.  The poor should always be welcome among believers.  We should embrace them and love on them.  We should stop asking "why" they are poor.  We should love them because they are poor.  We shouldn't give up on them because they won't help themselves.  We should help them.

Have you done anything to help the poor lately?  I've been considering my future as an attorney and I keep thinking about "public interest" law--law that helps those who can't pay for legal services.  I don't know why, but that is where I seem to be headed.  My church has been a good example of a body of believers who have a heart for the poor.  They welcome and embrace those who are poor and need help.  On April 9, our church is having a yard sale.  But EVERYTHING is FREE.  We're giving away what God has given us in hopes that we can reach out to others who are poor and in need of a free gift (literally and spiritually).

Let's all stop thinking of the poor as helpless people, panhandlers, homeless, or people who take advantage of the system.  Let's be thankful that God, in His grace, has saved us from these circumstances.  And Let's love all God's children.  Let's stop putting the poor in a box.

What Goes in Influences What Comes Out

"Blessed is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked or stand in the way of sinners or sit in the seat of mockers. But his delight is in the law of the Lord, and on his law he mediates day and night." Psalm 1:1-2

Did you know that according to the U.S. Census Bureau, in the year 2008, the average American  wasted 3,454 hours on media (TV, books, internet, etc.) and spent $882.02 on media related items?  Can you imagine how all that time invested in media affects us?  Isn't it scary to think that this much media consumption is what is influencing our society?  No wonder our standards have decreased.  Media is brainwashing us into thinking like the world, and as Christians, we're letting it.

Along with my morning study on the book of James, I've started reading Girls Gone Wise in a World Gone Wild, by Mary Kassian.  I originally bought the book, because I heard her on the radio recommending the book as a good gift for high school graduates.  I had no idea that her study of the Proverbs 7 girl gone wild would have such an impact on me.  To get the full benefit of reading the book, I've started following along with her book blog and am doing the study questions that are posted on her website http://www.girlsgonewise.com/.

In chapter 3, she suggests implementing a media reduction plan.  I've always thought that the idea of a media fast was a little too much and impractical--I mean I need my computer for school!  But Mary suggests that you 1) Turn Off, 2) Trim Back, and 3) Tune In.  Customize your own plan that will allow you to spend time delighting in God's Word instead of allowing yourself to be influenced by worldy counsel and TV. 

So for the next 30 days, I'm going to stop watching junky TV shows, like Grey's Anatomy.  I'm going to stop shopping online. I'm going to turn off my car radio and turn on my Christian CD's.  I'm going to stay reading my Bible every day.  I'm going to read the stack of books that I bought from the Christian bookstore last week instead of my magazines.  And I am NOT going to join Facebook--so stop asking!  Not only will this plan make me a better person, but it will benefit my family and my grades.

If the statistics are correct, most of us will have spent half of our lives consuming media in some form.  Let's all make a resolution that by the time we're 70, our own statistics will show that we used half of our time consuming God's Word and godly counsel.  If you're interested in joining the 30 day media challenge, here is a link with more information Media Reduction Plan. I signed up this morning, and Mary has already sent me my first encouraging email!

Are You a Bulldog Fan Yet?

If you haven't been watching college basketball, it's time to start.  And this year you need to be cheering for the little guys.  Butler University from Indianapolis, IN is back in the running to win it all.  If you don't know anything about the school or if you don't know anything about basketball, at least cheer for them because they have the cutest mascot.  Gotta love the bulldog!  Gotta love Hink!

I didn't go to Butler, but as a native Hoosier from Indianapolis, I'm a big fan.  My 2 year old even told me yesterday that he likes Butler.  Let's hope they take it all the way this year.  They've made it to the Final Four by beating some really good schools.  Let's see if they can keep it up...

Religion That We're Called to Practice

So What?

"Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says." James 1:22

When I first moved to Texas, I was 12.  My family had left a very strong, Bible-teaching church in another state.  You would think that moving to the Bible belt would make church seeking easy.  But my family visited 20 churches before we landed on the place that we would call home for 9 years.  We had this test that we gave each church when we visited.  My dad called it the "so what test."  After we would leave a church service, we would sit down as a family to discuss the "so what" from today's sermon.  Or in another words, "what did we learn that we can apply to our life today?"  It was important to my family to find a church that would teach us how to live as Christ followers.

I'm very thankful for my current pastor who does focus on applying God's Word to our lives.  There's always a "so what" to his messages.  This means that after I hear a sermon and how to apply it to my life, it's my responsibility to take action.  Just going to church on Sundays and filling my head with Scripture isn't enough.  I need to seek how to live the Scripture I'm taught.  I'm so blessed to be surrounded by Christians who want to "do" what Scripture says.

It's not enough to just study the Bible.  It's not enough to hear a good sermon every week.  And it's not enough to just be around other Christians.  Once we have put ourselves in a place where we can listen and hear what Scripture says, we have to take the next step and live it.  We should know the "so what" and we should follow Nike's advise and "just do it."  James says that the man who does what he learns "will be blessed in what he does (vs. 25)."

Beach Girls with Style

My girlfriend referred to my blog as a place to find modest and cute girly things.  So here's a post for her!  I found a collection called "Beachy Chic" from The Children's Place.  This is my favorite place to find little boy clothes, and their girl collections are pretty adorable too!

This is my idea of how a little girl should dress--accessories and all!  Isn't the white ruffle purse in the 2nd outfit so fun?!

Preserving Texas

I may have missed my calling along the way.  Or maybe I've found a new hobby.  But I'm starting to think that researching history might be in the cards for me after law school.

Today I went back to the courthouse in Milan County.  While I was wondering around the district courtroom, I met the nicest bailiff in the world!  He gave me a tour of the courthouse and told me about the renovation of the courthouse that took place about 10 years ago.  Even though some of the features are new, they are exact replicas of the original courtroom.  A lot of time and money has been spent to preserve the original tin ceiling, wooden walls, staircases, door hinges, and floors.  The place is beautiful on the inside.  It would be so cool to go to trial in the courtroom.  Here are pictures of the District Courtroom.  (The previous pictures I posted are of the County Courtroom.)

You can't tell from the pictures, but this courtroom is located on the 2nd floor of the building.  The back walls are solid wood--but they raise up just like a garage door!  That way, when it gets hot they can raise the wall and open all the windows to let in the breeze.  Now that the courthouse has air conditioning it's not really necessary.  But when the building was built, someone did some smart planning.

According to the bailiff, when President Bush was Governor of Texas, there was a campaign to encourage counties to renovate their courthouses.  However, there was a requirement to preserve the historical features of the buildings. You can tell that the people of Milan county were eager to participate in this program, because there are bricks with names of donors on the sidewalks outside.  Those people should be proud of their work.  If I ever write a novel, I want their courthouse and their downtown to be the setting.  There is something special about Cameron, Texas.

If you're ever in Cameron, check out the courthouse.  Then check out the county clerk's office where you will see a huge replica of the town from years ago.  It's so neat!

Since the Daughters of the Republic of Texas won't let me join their club (my relatives were from the East Coast), I'll have to find another historical society to join.  But preserving Texas culture and history seems like a worthy post law school project, right?  Who knew history could be so fun?

What are you saying?

"My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man's anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires." James 1:19-20

My little boy's new phrase this week has been "what are you saying?"  He asks me that almost every time I say something to him and it drives me nuts!  I keep telling him that I know he hears me, but if he doesn't understand, he needs to say "I don't understand Mommy."  It just sounds so much nicer.

As annoying as it is when my little boy conveniently doesn't hear me, I know I've done this to God.  I specifically remember a day in December when I was really contemplating a decision that I needed to make.  I prayed that God would hit me over the head with an answer.  Minutes later, He literally did when I turned on the radio (to a station I rarely listen to) and heard a sermon answering my question.  But I disregarded that sermon as being old fashioned.  The next day, He spoke through my mother. And witnesses will tell you that I became very angry at her for a few days.  I spent a week in tears too.  Thankfully, God kept talking until I finally listened.  If only my heart had just been listening sooner.

Usually, when I read this verse, I focus on the "be slow to anger" part, but today, the "be quick to listen" part reminded me that I need to listen more.  I think we would all become better people if we truly listened to other people.  And I know that we can have the righteous life that God promises if we listen to God.  I'm just praying that the next time God speaks, my heart is ready to listen.

Controlling Clutter

As a boy mom, I have come to realize that trains, cars, and balls are going to be in my house--and in every corner of my house.  So I have embraced the clutter by attempting to control it.  Here is the best $10 purchase I ever made at Wal-Mart. 

It serves as a fort, a camping tent (see the sleeping bag), a toy box, and place where boys of all ages can hang out.

Grandpa liked it so much, he has one at his house now! 

My Clients are the Best in the World

"She looks for wool and flax and works with her hands in delight." Proverbs 31:13

The Excellent Wife in Proverbs had an interesting talent.  She sought out wool and flax and then spun it into garments for her family.  Gill's Exposition of the Entire Bible had some interesting historical notes on this verse and the topic of spinning wool:  The practice of spinning was common among princesses throughout history.  Records shows that  both Greek and Roman women of importance practiced the art of spinning and working with wool.  And there is a Jewish saying that "there is no wisdom in a woman but in the distaff."  Apparently the Proverbs wife understood that her role was to work with her hands and to produce garments for her family.  She was good at it and delighted in this job.  She also understood quality.  In her era, a homespun wool garment was what princes wore.  She wanted her husband to dress accordingly.

I don't think this verse means that we need to be spinning wool for our husband's today.   But it does meant that we are to take delight in working at home for our families.  Doing laundry should be delightful.  Ironing shirts should make you smile.  Why?  Because that's what a wife can do to serve her husband.  (And because we could be spinning the material from scratch.)  The Excellent wife was not an idle woman.

I commented to a friend the other day that going to work was so much easier than being a full-time mom.  But being a good wife and mother is not about easy work.  It's not about getting our children out of our hair for a few hours.  It's not about having "people" to help us out with housework. (I met a newly wed the other day who had a housekeeper!)  Being a wife and a mom means that we take pride and joy in being good at what we do, because our client's are the best in the world!  

Potted Plant 2011

"For the sun rises with scorching heat and withers the plant; its blossom falls and its beauty is destroyed. In the same way, the rich man will fade away even while he goes about his business." James 1:11

This verse reminds me of a potted plant I bought last year.  And another plant I bough the year before.  Ok, I tend to kill potted plants because I forget to water them.  It's really sad because they're so pretty for the first few weeks.  But when the Texas heat gets to them and my water doesn't, they turn an icky brown.  Hopefully this year's plant will last longer.

James compares my dead plants to a rich man.  To read this verse in context with what I've been learning this week, I think James is trying to make the point that during trials, the rich man doesn't have an advantage.  Money doesn't help.  Money can't solve our problems, because only God can.  Relying on money (or financial security) to solve our problems is only going to turn us into miserable, withered people.

So if we're in debt, if we're debt free, if we're rich, and if we're broke, we can expect trials in our lives.  We can also expect that money can't help us through these trials.  So what should we do?  Stop focusing all our attention on saving, earning, or spending money.  It will wear us out and fade us into icky brown plants.  Start relying on God and trust that He will provide the money if we need it to solve our problems.  Let's be people who focus on God when we're stressed, because God promises that this man "will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him" (vs. 12).

Divorce Isn't Popular with Real Christians

I heard a discussion about the Christian divorce rate last night on the radio and decided to follow-up on what I'd heard.  Here is a link to the article I found on this topic Christians & Divorce in USA Today.

The General Social Survey from the National Opinion Research Center found the following:

• The divorce rate for Christians is 42%
• The divorce rate for non-religious affiliated persons is 50%

Bradley Wright, a University of Connecticut sociologist researched divorce in evangelicals and found the following:

• 6 out of 10 Evangelicals who do not regularly attend church are divorced or separated
• Only 38% of Evangelicals who attend church weekly have been divorced or separated

The National Marriage Project at the University of Virginia found the following:

• Americans who attend religious services several times a month were 35% less likely to get divorced than those with no religious affiliation
• Nominal protestants were 20% more likely to get divorced than those with no religious affiliation

So what do the statistics show?  They show that being a nominal Christian is harmful to your marriage.  They show that married persons who claim to be Christians but who do not regularly attend church together are more likely to get divorced or separated.  They show that being a "nominal" Christian is worse for your marriage than not being religious at all.

This makes perfect sense.  Marriage is a commitment between a man, a woman, and God.  And when the man and woman leave God out of the picture, the marriage cannot be complete.  God is what makes the marriage work.  So when couples become "nominal" Christians and don't seek God in their relationship, don't be surprised when the marriage doesn't work.  It's not supposed to work that way.

So what do we do about this finding? 

• First, we need to make a commitment within our own marriages to not be "nominal" Christians.  We have to maintain our relationship with God and attend church regularly as a couple.
• Second, encourage people who are suffering marital problems to go to church.  Encourage them to work on their own relationship with God before giving up on their spouse.  
• Third, counsel people who want to get married.  They need to understand the importance of their relationship with God and the importance of going to church regularly.

A Full Coverage Plan

"But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all generously and without reproach, and it will be given to him.  But he must ask in faith without any doubting, for the one who doubts is like the surf of the sea, driven and tossed by the wind." James 1:5-6

My husband had a heart procedure last November during which the doctors couldn't fix the heart condition because they couldn't find anything wrong. (My 28 year old husband had previously coded during a stress test.)  God has been good and has resolved all his heart problems since that time.  The insurance company, however, hasn't been very generous in covering the procedure.  To their credit, the doctors and hospital involved have made appeals and requested extra coverage, but the insurance company was not inclined to cooperate.  Knowing the state of health care in the U.S., I can't half blame the insurance company, but as a customer it makes you wonder why we pay so much each month when the insurance company doesn't want to help when we need it.

Thankfully, God is not like an insurance company.  He's always there when we need Him.  And if we ask Him for wisdom He gives it freely.  We are just required to ask for wisdom in faith, without any doubting.  We cannot approach God like our health insurance provider, hoping He might provide when we need Him.  He promises to be there and to give wisdom when we ask.  We need to have faith that God will do what He says. 

This sounds so simple.  But I'm a planner, and I always want a back-up plan.  I'm learning (slowly and painfully) that I don't need a back-up plan when I let God take control.  His plan and wisdom are perfect for my life when I have faith and completely surrender to His will.  God doesn't look at premiums and deductibles.  Jesus covered the cost of our insurance, and God doesn't deny coverage when we seek it.

No Pain, No Gain

"Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance.  And let endurance have its perfect result so that you may be perfect and complete lacking in nothing." James 1:2-4

I have started a 30 day Bible study on the book of James.  I love the book of James.  At one point, I even memorized the entire book.  God has been showing me that it's time to start meditating on the book again.  (He even managed to let this Bible study book fall out of my storage box in the garage so that I've been staring at it for the past 2 weeks while working out on my elliptical!  I'm finally listening...)

Today, the first lesson seemed to be right on point with what has been going on in my life.  You could say that I have been facing a trial of some kind, a trial that I hope will develop endurance and maturity in my life. This passage reminded me that I must face this trial with joy.  I have to admit, I've been feeling sorry for myself lately.  And I've been harboring resentment towards the person at the root of my trial.  But God tells me that I must have joy! 

Trials are spiritual exercise for the soul.  Just like my muscles hurt and beg me to stop working out during the first few weeks of getting in shape, my soul doesn't want to hurt either.  But if I'm going to gain spiritual endurance and perfection, it's got to hurt sometimes.  I just have to face the hurt with joy.  I must have joy knowing that God is working in my life and He wants to make my life complete.

Let's remember today that Christians must endure various trials in order to be perfect and complete.  And let's "exult in our tribulations, knowing that tribulation brings about perseverance; and perseverance, proven character; and proven character hope." Romans 5:-4

A Taste for the Juicy

Some girls dream about Louis Vuitton, others need their Gucci, but I have a taste for the Juicy.  On my vacation to Hawaii a couple of years ago I fell in love with Juicy Couture and have become a true Juicy girl.  Somehow, my husband "gets it" too, because he has bought me some fabulous vintage-looking Juicy jewelry.  He's also getting me a 50's inspired Juicy handbag!  I know, I married a pretty special guy.

This weekend I admired the adorable Juicy Spring 2011 Collection.  Here are some of my favorite Juicy items (and yes, I know they're not my size.) 

I guess girls of all ages need a little pink and bling in their lives!  To see more go to Juicy Couture!

Growing Tomato Plants

"Let us not lose heart in doing good, for in due time we will reap if we do not grow weary." Galatians 6:9

My 2 year old is a science nut.  He watches Sid the Science Kid all the time and he retains everything.  Yesterday, he informed me that we have muscles all over our bodies that help us move!  (Anatomy/physiology has been a hobby of mine since 6th grade, so I was very pleased by my son's sudden interest in muscles.)  Since he likes science, I thought it would be fun to teach him about seeds and plants.  So this picture is our tomato garden that we planted this afternoon.  Can you see our greenhouse pots and our outside pots?  I'm just hoping that a seed in a pot somewhere actually decides to grow. 

At church this morning, we talked about being planted in Christ.  Galatians 6 says that if we continue to do good, we will reap in due time.  But until that due time occurs, we have to keep doing good--and we can't get tired of doing what we know we're supposed to be doing.  That means that we can't get discouraged by the difficulties of life.  If we remain faithful and trust Jesus during the storms of life, He'll get us safely where we need to go and we'll reap the benefit of our faith.  Maybe not in this lifetime, but in due time.

I have no idea if my son's tomato plants will ever bloom.  The Sesame Street planter's kit says that harvest time should be in 70 days, but we'll see... I do know, however, that in due time, believers will reap the benefits of doing good and trusting in God. 

5 Ways to Be a Good Wife

"She does him good and not evil all the days of her life." Proverbs 31:12

When I first read this description of the Excellent Wife in Proverbs, I thought that this was obvious.  Shouldn't every wife want to do good for her husband?  But then I realized how important this is.  This wife doesn't just do good for her husband, but she does good all the days of her life.  She doesn't do evil to him, EVER.  She doesn't divorce him, threaten him, manipulate him, nag him, or belittle him.  She does good to him for her entire life. 

While studying this verse, I found a sermon on point. See Sermon Central to read the manuscript.  The preacher, George Dillahunty, explained that a wife should strive to do good to meet the needs of her husband.  This can be hard to do, because first, you have to know what your own husband needs.  After 6 1/2 years of marriage, I'm still learning what my man needs.  And maybe that's because his needs change over time.  But my job is to figure it out and to meet his needs.

In the Proverbs 31 sermon I found, the preacher listed 5 ways that a wife can meet some basic needs of her husband. They are the following:

1. A wife must provide physical intimacy to her husband.

2. A wife must respect her husband.

3. A wife must give encouragement.

4. A wife must take care of her appearance.

5. A wife must be a good mother.  (A husband can't fulfill this role with his children.)

If you are not a wife yet, I hope this blog post will show you that this isn't a job to be taken lightly.  If it were easy, there wouldn't be so many divorces.  If you are a wife, remember to always do good to your husband.  I know that I need to work on a few of these areas.  I'm not a perfect wife, but I hope that someday my husband can say, "she did good to me all the days of her life."

My Rehabilitation in Christ

"For by grace you have been saved through faith; and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God; not as a result of works, so that no one may boast." Ephesians 2:8-9

I sat in a courthouse today and read about juvenile law for about an hour.  I was struck by how much discretion is given to prosecutors and judges when children are being tried for crimes and delinquent acts.  The research article I was reading made the point that we need these discretionary systems in juvenile law if we want to rehabilitate the children that can be rehabilitated and if we want to protect society from the children who can't be rehabilitated.  The hardest part about juvenile law is figuring out who can be rehabilitated.  The jury is still out on that one...

When I read Ephesians chapter 2 today, I was struck by the fact that we, as sinful human beings, are considered dead as a result of our sin.  On our own, we cannot be rehabilitated.  But God, our Judge, had mercy on us.  He sent Jesus Christ to suffer the consequences of our sins (and to raise again) so that we have the chance to be rehabilitated.  Ephesians tells us that we could never be rehabilitated by our own works.   Instead, our rehabilitation occurs when we have faith in God--when we believe that He has extended His grace to us through His Son. 

That is truly amazing grace!  Can you imagine a human judge telling a convicted criminal that he can be acquitted because the judge's innocent son will serve the criminal's sentence instead?  And then not even requiring the criminal's free status to be probationary or contingent on his future actions?  That is never going to happen in our justice system. 

I'm so thankful that God is rich in mercy and love. And I'm so glad I have been rehabilitated in Christ!

Texas Does Some Things Right

One perk of being married to a lawyer is getting to go to work with him when he travels.  This week we visited some places that could have been named Nowhere, Texas.  Of course, my version of the middle of nowhere is  a place that is an hour from the nearest Walmart or Super Target.  To be honest, I'm not sure I could handle living in Nowhere, Texas.  I'm too much like Lisa Douglas, the attorney's wife in Green Acres, because "city life is the life for me."

That said, there's something beautiful about the smaller towns in Texas.  Somehow, despite all our technological advances and cultural changes, the small towns have managed to maintain a charming, historic vibe.  Plus, the people are friendly, you feel safe, and the scenery is amazing!

Cameron was one of the larger towns on our tour and it didn't disappoint.  It is home to the beautiful Milan County Courthouse. 

When I wondered inside the building, I felt like I had walked into a Grisham novel.  It was beautiful!  I think I was actually living history.

Ok, my reaction might be surprising to some people.  I mean, it was just a courthouse.  But Texas does courthouses right.  They're architecturally pleasing and the historical societies have done amazing work to preserve them.  Even in the small towns of Texas, justice is served in some beautiful places.

I'm a Domestic Relations Manager

Let's be honest. When a woman tells you she's a stay-at-home mom or a homemaker you don't have a clue what she's like.  If she told you that she was a doctor you could surmise that she was smart, dedicated, and an over-achiever.  If she told you she was a teacher you'd know she was good with kids, compassionate, and could probably tutor your child.  If she told you she was a lawyer you'd probably figure that she argues well, is rarely intimidated, and could draft you a will or sue your neighbor for you.  But what is a stay-at-home mom?

I don't think anybody respects the title homemaker or stay-at-home mom anymore.  And I don't think those titles really do justice to the women who have them.  I mean, I'm technically a stay-at-home mom, but I don't stay home all day.  I spend time running around town with my kids, helping out at church, having coffee meetings with girlfriends and I go to law school too.  And I would never call myself a homemaker either.  Just because I clean the house I live in, and I cook and do laundry for the people who live there, doesn't mean that I make the home.  It's the people who make the home. And what's a housewife?  As opposed to a non-housewife?  If you watch The Real Housewives series on Bravo you'll realize that the term housewife means absolutely nothing!

It's time for stay-at-home moms to adopt titles for themselves that accurately describe what they do!  If the hospital janitor can call himself a sanitation engineer and the nursing assistant can call herself the patient advocate specialist, then maybe it's time for moms to rethink their titles. Just because society can't think of descriptive ways to communicate the value of a wife doesn't mean we have to accept the stay-at-home mom title and stereotype.

The next time someone asks what I do for a living I was thinking about telling them that I'm a Domestic Relations Manager.  Or maybe a Household Economist.  Or maybe a Freelance Family Specialist.  Any other suggestions?

The Christian Race Across America

"Therefore, since we have so great a cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us also lay aside every encumbrance and the sin which so easily entangles us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God." Hebrews 12:1-2

At one point in my life I considered myself to be a runner. After 2 kids and 4 years of sedentary work, I'm just now building back up my endurance level.  I try to do aerobic exercise for 1 hour a day, either pushing 50 lbs of children around my neighborhood for a couple of miles or maintaining a steady pace for 5-6 miles on my elliptical.  The key to successfully completing my task is to work out at a good pace, wear good shoes,  ensure that I have a complete hour set aside to work out and of course I have to have inspiration.  My mom inspires me, and I want to look as good as she does when I'm her age.  And my goal is to reach a certain number on the scale.  I'm not quite there yet, but I'm making good progress. 

Although my regimen isn't perfect, it's a picture of how I'm supposed to be living my Christian life.   I'm supposed to prepare myself by laying aside sin and distractions.  I'm supposed to live a lifestyle that can be maintained with endurance.  And I'm supposed to look to Jesus as my inspiration and my goal.  He lived this life, He suffered my penalty, He overcame death and humanity and now He is seated at the right hand of God. Talk about the ULTIMATE example.

I think sometimes I run the Christian relay or the sprint.  You know, I get all revved up and excited but then get tired and discouraged and let life drag me down.  It's easy to do when people close to you let you down.  Or work gets in the way.  Or when you get sick.

But I'm ready to start living my Christian Race Across America.  Have you seen the guy who is running 40 miles a day across America? (Check out Regis and Kelli).  I want to be able to maintain my lifestyle and my Bible study.  So I've started by sharing my goals with a few people.  Then I laid aside my first encumbrance.  Hopefully this time next year I'll still be running strong...

A Thorn in My Flesh

"And He has said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness.' Most gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may dwell in me.  Therefore I am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ's sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong." 2 Corinthians 12:9-10

Have you ever felt weak?  You know, you feel like you've done everything you could possibly do to fix a situation but then you realize that it's completely out of your hands.  Or there are times when you've done the right thing, and then things still didn't go right despite knowing you were doing exactly what you were supposed to do.  Those situations and times are given to us to show us our weaknesses. 

The Apostle Paul described his weakness as "a thorn in the flesh, a messenger of Satan to torment me--to keep me from exalting myself" (vs.7) and he wrote verses 9 and 10 as an explanation that the weaknesses are given to us to show us God's strength.  Because when we recognize the power of Jesus Christ who dwells in us, we will see that our weaknesses are insignificant.  By ourselves we really our weak and bruised.  But with God, we can have strength and power.

Let's stop obsessing over and holding on to our weaknesses.  Let's give them to God and let's recognize that God can display His strength and power in our lives.

March Madness: The Cinderella Story for Men

March is about the Cinderella Story. It's where guy's dreams and girls' fairy tales come together because of a ball and a basket.  March is about the American dream.  March is about college spirit.  And March is about the madness.

Ok, in girl terms, March is the perfect time of year to express your femininity and your sports knowledge.  And if you're so not understanding what I'm talking about, it's a great time to fake being a sports fan, but faking it so no one will know any better.  Here's how:

1. Go to http://espn.go.com/ and click on the bracket challenge.  (You have to do this by noon tomorrow or else you've missed the deadline.)

2. Fill out your bracket.  Invite that special man in your life to fill out his.  Then print the brackets and hang them on the refrigerator.

3. Keep track of who you picked and start cheering for those teams when the games start on Thursday.  Keep cheering until the end of the tournament.

4. Have a party or invite your man to watch the national championship basketball game with you. 

Once you follow these steps, you'll discover that you can actually talk sports with your man.  You'll have a vested interest in the teams you pick and can argue that they're going to win.  The NCAA tournament is unpredictable and the "Cinderella Story" is what everybody talks about.  Every guy wants a 12 seeded team to find it's fairy godmother during March.  Every guy wants that team to magically win each round and make it to the Final Four. 

So pick a lower seeded team to make it to the Final Four.  Then pick some safe bets (1 seeds are always safe).  And then just have fun.  Even if you've never shown interest in college basketball before, your man will notice and appreciate your effort.  And you can have fun being a college basketball fan.  Even if you didn't go to college, pick a school and a mascot and enjoy the March Madness!

Making the Most of the Opportunity

"Conduct yourselves with wisdom toward outsiders, making the most of the opportunity. Let your speech always be with grace, seasoned, as it were, with salt, so that you will know how you should respond to each person." Colossians 4:5-6

I love how Paul says that we should "make the most of the opportunity" when he refers to our conduct with unbelievers.  We are to use wisdom and carefully consider how our conduct will influence unbelievers.  And then we make sure that our speech is like salt, preserving our testimony.  In Bible times, salt wasn't used to make french fries taste better, but it was used to prevent food from spoiling.  Thus, our speech is to be a preservative for our testimony.

When was the last time you considered how your conduct and speech would influence unbelievers?  I'm in my 4th year of graduate school and am surrounded by many unbelievers.  This verse has been a challenge to me, to make sure that I remember to maintain my testimony while showing love to unbelievers.  But sometimes when I'm not thinking about it,  I  forget that my conduct and speech still important. For example, I'm pretty sure my response to the telemarketer I talked to yesterday was not speech, like salt.  It was much more acidic and it ended abruptly when I hung up.

For stay-at-home moms and people who don't have a regular group of unbelievers to be around.  We need to make the most of the opportunities we do have.  So when someone rings your door bell to sell you cookies, or when the girl at the Target check-out counter wants to talk.  Let's conduct ourselves with wisdom and make the most of the opportunity by speaking words of salt!

"Stinkies are Hard Mommy!"

"Rejoice always; pray without ceasing; in everything give thanks; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus." I Thessalonians 5: 16-18

The apostle Paul was my kind of guy.  He was a straight shooter and got right to the point.  The instructions he wrote to the church in Thessalonica were simple: 1) Rejoice always; 2) Pray without ceasing; 3) In everything give thanks.   It sounds so easy, but we make it so hard for ourselves to follow these simple commands.

It reminds me of potty training.  I have a very intelligent toddler who knows what he's supposed to do on the toilet.  But for some reason, he refuses to use the potty and instead cries almost every time I have to change a stinky diaper.  He tells me every time that "stinkies are hard mommy!"  And every time, I tell him that if he would just use the toilet he wouldn't get diaper rash and he wouldn't need me to change his stinky diapers.

I wonder how often God says, "if you would only follow the simple commands I give you, then your life would be so much easier."  The commands are simple.  Rejoice, pray and give thanks.  For some reason, I think we too often wear the Christian pull-ups and have to deal with the stinkies because we won't obey.  It's time to follow the simple commands and embrace the kind of life that God wants us to have.

5 Staples for Every Real Woman's Wardrobe

I'm sure you've all watched the Today Show or Oprah when they have the segment on "Staples for Every Woman's Wardrobe."  I have to laugh when they do these segments.  I mean, really?  Does every woman really need a trench coat?  Uh, no.  If you happen to live in Texas, you own a winter coat, a cardigan sweater, and a denim jacket.  And does every woman really need a little black dress?  No.  When was the last time you needed your LBD for a cocktail party?  (I think it's been 3 years for me and I'm surrounded by Dallas self-proclaimed socialites every week.) 

I wanted to be a little more realistic and offer 5 Staples for Every Real Woman's Wardrobe.

1.  A well-fitted pair of jeans.  You can wear them almost anywhere.  You can dress them up and dress them down.  And the right pair of jeans will make you look slim and trim.

2. A pretty dress.  We all need dresses for Easter, graduations, and weddings.  But it doesn't have to be a little black dress, it just needs to be a dress that we would feel comfortable wearing for any occasion. The dress should flatter you and you should consider it your go-to item when all else fails.

3. A pair of black pants or a black pencil skirt.  The black pants or skirt provide a blank canvas for any top.  Some women look better in pants and should embrace the pants to give them curves and shape.  And curvier women need the skirt.  Just be sure to play with color on top.

4. A suit.  I know this sounds old fashioned, but you always need a suit when it's not convenient to buy one.  The suit is a must-wear item for a job interview.  (I was even hired once because the hospital administrator said she liked my suit.)  The suit is appropriate for for funerals.  The suit is necessary for court or other important meetings. And the suit is always appropriate at church.  Pick a flattering color suit and DO NOT wear a white blouse unless you know it makes you look hot.  Just remember that black and white done wrong can make you look like a nun.  So if you pick black and white, you better accessorize well.

5.  A cute, matching sweat suit.  As a wife and mother I understand the advantage to wearing comfortable clothes when I'm getting groceries or doing the laundry.  But if we want to keep our men happy, we have to fight the "give up" look.   The right sweatsuit matched with make-up and flashy jewelry can make you look like a rock star.  So invest in cute Juicy sweats or Calvin Klein work-out clothes (great deals at Ross!) and be comfortable in style.

Everything else in your closet should be an expression of you!  So buy the silk blouse you've been admiring.  Or take a risk with the lace shrug that intimidates you.  Wear these with one of the staple items in your closet and you can't go wrong!  All the pictures are from items currently available at http://shop.nordstrom.com/.  They offer petite and extended sizes as you can see from the cute plus-size sweat suit. Check them out!

Take it To the Lord In Prayer

"Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.  And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."  Philippians 4:6-7

What a comforting verse.  I did a research study last year on mental health issues and medication for disorders like anxiety.  Researchers have found that purely medicating people with mental health problems doesn't cure them.  Medication just masks the problem.  That's why treating anxiety disorders requires more than just Prozac.  Psychiatrists try to prescribe combination treatment with medication and behavioral therapy--both of which are expensive, time-consuming, and difficult to administer.  Meanwhile, Philippians tells us that Christians don't have to have anxiety because we can have peace--and not just any peace.  God promises us peace which surpasses all comprehension if we just give our requests to God in prayer. 

What a Friend we have in Jesus, all our sins and griefs to bear!
What a privilege to carry everything to God in prayer!
O what peace we often forfeit, O what needless pain we bear,
All because we do not carry everything to God in prayer.

Have we trials and temptations? Is there trouble anywhere?
We should never be discouraged; take it to the Lord in prayer.
Can we find a friend so faithful who will all our sorrows share?
Jesus knows our every weakness; take it to the Lord in prayer.

Are we weak and heavy laden, cumbered with a load of care?
Precious Savior, still our refuge, take it to the Lord in prayer.
Do your friends despise, forsake you? Take it to the Lord in prayer!
In His arms He’ll take and shield you; you will find a solace there.

Blessed Savior, Thou hast promised Thou wilt all our burdens bear
May we ever, Lord, be bringing all to Thee in earnest prayer.
Soon in glory bright unclouded there will be no need for prayer
Rapture, praise and endless worship will be our sweet portion there.

--What a Friend We Have in Jesus, Joseph M. Scriven

J-E-L-L-O

My toddler is refusing to eat most foods.  As a nurse, I know this is normal child development and I really haven't freaked out about this yet.  Instead, I've been trying to get him to try new things with the anticipation that he'll find a new food or flavor he likes.  This week, we tried Jello.

I was very proud of him when I found this:

But then reality set in when I discovered his secret.

How to Have Beautiful Feet

"...As it is written, 'How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news of good things!" Romans 10:15

Paul uses the words of Isaiah to describe messengers of the Gospel.  He says that the people who bring the good news of the Gospel to unbelievers have beautiful feet. 

I have to confess that I don't share the actual Gospel message very often.  I defend conservative, Christian views frequently.  But I have failed to share the message of the Gospel on a regular basis.  So here is the Gospel message straight from Romans:

1) All people are sinners.  "For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God." Romans 3:23

2) As sinners, we all face the death penalty as our punishment.  "For the wages of sin is death..." Romans 6:23a

3) God has given us the gift of life and the opportunity to escape our death sentence.  "...but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord." Romans 6:23b

4) God made this gift available to us by having His Son, Jesus die in our place.  "But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us." Romans 5:8

5) After Jesus died, he didn't stay dead but He rose again. If we confess that we our sinners and believe that Jesus died for us and rose again, He will save us.  "that if you confess with your mouth Jesus as Lord and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved; for with the heart a person believes, resulting in righteousness, and with the mouth he confesses, resulting in salvation." Romans 10:9-10

6) Salvation is for anyone who is willing to confess and believe in Jesus. "Whoever will call on the name of the Lord will be saved." Romans 10:13

7) Once we become Christians, we ought to live in a manner pleasing to God.  God gave us the gift of eternal life, and we need to show our gratitude and love by living lives that honor Him! "Therefore, I urge you brotheren by the mercies of God, to present your bodies a living and holy sacrifice, acceptable to God, which is your spiritual service of worship.  And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect." Romans 12: 1-2

Fellow Christ-followers, share the Gospel message today and work on making your feet beautiful!

These Boots Were Made for Summer!

Every girl needs to have an awesome pair of cowboy boots.  And I don't mean boots that you would actually wear at a ranch or in a horse stall.  I'm talking about boots with a delicate heel, a pointy toe, and a pretty design. 

When I was pregnant, cowboy boots saved my life.  They were easy to walk in, and they were so incredibly comfortable.  I even treated myself to a pair of boots for Mother's Day last year so that I could continue the cowboy boot trend after my son was born.  I'm so glad I did.

Every girl needs to make the investment for the perfect pair of boots.  I think many girls hesitate to purchase boots because they're afraid of looking too western, but here are the top reasons why every girl needs a pair of good cowboy boots:

 1) They are the most comfortable pair of shoes you will own
2) Everyone's legs and ankles look good in a pair of boots.  No cankles, varicose veins, or ugly toes are visible!
3) Boots are versatile and they look good with skirts, pants, and shorts.
4) They last forever.  Seriously, get a little polish and you can wear the same pair for years.
5) They look better than flip flops and tennis shoes.

I've posted pictures of the boots I've been admiring this year.  And they're even on sale now!  To find your own favorite pair of boots, visit your local Cavender's or visit their website at http://www.cavenders.com/.  Cowboy boots are a great purchase for yourself or a great gift idea. 

Once you go cowgirl, you won't ever want to go back.

My Not So Green Thumb

I'm not even going to pretend to have a green thumb.  I barely know the names of plants and flowers.  I just know what looks good.  So, since I can't grow my own, I've started buying live flowers every week to put in my kitchen.  And you know what?  They make me smile and they make me want to be in the kitchen more!  Try it out.  Add flowers to your grocery list and see what happens. 

Workaholics Anonymous

"Do not wear yourself out to get rich; have the wisdom to show restraint."  Proverbs 23:4 NIV


The downfall of having my colorful, red personality (see previous blog post) is that I'm a workaholic.  I don't intend to be, but I get really antsy when I'm not working.  The only way for me to truly relax is to remove me entirely from the places where I can do work--my house included.  Vacations were invented for people like me. And when I don't take vacations, I get tired and I wear myself out.

This verse was written for all the workaholics out there. People like me need salaries. We need to know that even if we kill ourselves to finish our work, we're not going to get paid anymore.  The hourly wage and incentive system is awful for the workaholic.  We're always thinking, "if I could just put in a few extra hours then I could buy this..."

This verse is a reminder to me that we have to show restraint by creating boundaries for ourselves.  How? I know that for me, having a salary takes away the lure of overtime and extra money.  And volunteer work is even better, because I'm not even worrying about the payoff and can focus on what I'm doing.  Being a stay-at-home mom has taught me to be smarter about how I spend money since we don't have as much coming in.  Staying away from job boards to look at potential jobs is good too.  Walking through model homes of houses that I might be able to afford but really don't need is bad.  Shopping at Willow Bend at Neiman Marcus is bad too.

Let's show some restraint and stop tempting ourselves because as verse 5 says "cast but a glance at riches, and they are gone, for they will surely sprout wings and fly off to the sky like an eagle." 

Are you Politically Informed?

 I'm curious to know how much women know about politics and current events.  Every lady's magazine has a quiz to help you self-evaluate.  So I wrote this quiz to help you test your knowledge of politics.  (The answers are at the bottom of the blog post.)

1. When you filled up your car this week, you noticed that the price of a gallon of gasoline has finally surpassed the price of your Starbucks latte'.  Who is to blame for the increased gas price?
    a) NAFTA
    b) Enron
    c) Conflict in the middle east
    d) OPEC

2.  The First Lady, Michelle Obama, is trying to fight childhood obesity.  As a part of this effort she has done which of the following:
    a) Created a line of work-out videos
    b) Hired a tofu chef to help her write a cook book
    c) Became an apiarist (beekeeper) and started raising bees at the White House
    d) Decided she will no longer eat meat.  She wants to lead by example.

3.  True or False--The Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) says that marriage is between one man and one woman.

4. This person is not a United States Supreme Court Justice:
    a) Samuel Alito
    b) Harriet Meirs
    c) Anthony Kennedy
    d) Sonia Sotomayor

Bonus: What is the best state for shopping? (Hint: They don't have sales tax)
    a) Nevada
    b) Delaware
    c) Hawaii
    d) Tennessee

If you had trouble answering any of these questions, it's time to start thinking about politics, current events and government.  Log on to http://www.foxnews.com/, watch shows like The O'Reilly Factor, go to Barnes and Noble and pick up a book by a sitting Supreme Court Justice (Justices Thomas and Scalia are my favorite), start talking politics with your husband/boyfriend, or start listening to Talk Radio.

As women, our opinion matters.  As mothers, we need to teach our children the truth about law and politics so that they don't learn it at public school.  And as wives, I think our husbands find it rather attractive to have a wife who knows why the price of gas went up! 

This quiz is your reminder to learn something new today.

Answers: 1) d; 2) c; 3) True; 4) b; Bonus--Delaware! 

Parenting is Not for the Faint of Heart

"Discipline your son, for in that there is hope; do not be a willing party to his death." Proverbs 19:18 NIV

Wow! This verse kind of says it all.  If we don't discipline our children, we are an accessory to their downfall.  And the message is clear.  We have to discipline our children.  We don't negotiate.  We don't tolerate.  We don't just pray and hope they act like good people.  We must discipline.

I think a lot of moms feel like the task of disciplining belongs to fathers.  But they're wrong.  Justice is swift, consistent, and needs to be done when the child can connect their bad act with the consequences of the action.  That means that it's ok to spank your child when he's screaming in Super Target.  I mean, come on, you can't use time-out at Super Target.  Yes, it is legal for a parent or grandparent to spank in Texas, even in public places!  Section 9.61 of the Texas Penal Code and section 151.001 of the Texas Family Code both discuss the parental right and DUTY to discipline one's child. (But these sections do not apply to Foster children.)

§ 9.61. PARENT-CHILD.

(a) The use of force, but not 
deadly force, against a child younger than 18 years is justified:
  (1)  if the actor is the child's parent or stepparent or 
is acting in loco parentis to the child;  and
  (2)  when and to the degree the actor reasonably 
believes the force is necessary to discipline the child or to 
safeguard or promote his welfare. 

§ 151.001. RIGHTS AND DUTIES OF PARENT.  (a) A parent of a 
child has the following rights and duties:
  (1)  the right to have physical possession, to direct 
the moral and religious training, and to designate the residence of 
the child;
  (2)  the duty of care, control, protection, and 
reasonable discipline of the child;

Just keep reminding yourself (I have to do this a lot), that if I discipline my son per the instructions of Proverbs, there is hope!

When it Comes to Fashion, Size Doesn't Matter

Shopping should be fun for all women, but sometimes it can be a downer.  Have you ever tried on a cute outfit and realized that you needed a size 2 or 3 times larger than what you normally wear?  It's not your fault.  Blame the fashion manufacturers. 

It doesn't make sense mathematically why a person can wear a size 2 in one store but needs a size 9 or 10 in another.  It sounds like I'm exaggerating, but you if you looked through my closet, I'm confident you can find an assortment of sizes--all of which actually fit me!  The only answer I can find to this conundrum is that each manufacturer uses their own sizing.  And there is no such thing as standard sizing for women's clothing. 

What does this mean?  This means you have to try clothes on.  Even if you know your measurements, you still need to try things on.  And if you have to buy a size 3 times larger than normal, who cares?  Fashion is not about how skinny you are or whether you can fit into the newest trend.  True fashion is about knowing what looks good on you and wearing what flatters you.  If you find something that fits like a glove, no one will notice your lumps or your bird legs.  If you have curves, find clothes that make them look sexy.  And if you're all skin and bones, find clothes that give you a shape. 

But stop worrying about what size you wear.  Start wearing what looks good.  And start loving how you look!

A Colorful Personality

One of my professors recently made my class take a series of personality tests.  According to the analysis he gave, I have a red personality.  This means that I'm a goal-driven person who likes blunt answers and facts.  If you want to communicate with me, I apparently like short meetings, little detail, and I always want to know the bottom line.  I have the personality of a military officer, a politician, and an investment banker.

I guess I'm supposed to feel good knowing that I'm ambitious and in a category of successful people.  (Donald Trump, Bill Gates, Martha Stewart, Jerry Jones and John McCain all share my personality type.)  But this analysis definitely made me think about how I communicate with others.  Just because I like to know facts and figures doesn't mean my friends and/or clients do too.  Some people need a pep talk before they get bad news.  Some people need to express themselves before then can receive information (these people drive me crazy).  And some people need me to care about their feelings.

I'm working on this.  I'm trying to understand other people now that I have a better understanding of myself.  I'm also trying to find new ways to communicate with people who don't understand my communication style.  I've decided to focus on James 1:19 (NIV) which says "My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry." With God's grace, hopefully my colorful personality will become a blessing to others!

The Trustworthy Teammate

"The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain."  Proverbs 31:11

The Excellent Wife from Proverbs is back--I want to meditate on 1 verse about her a week. In verse 11 she is a wife who has earned her husband's trust so that he will not be lacking gain. Basically, she's not a liability to her husband.  He can trust her to handle herself, the family, the house, and the finances.  She's got a track record which proves to her husband that she can be trusted.  And she understands and shares her husband's goals and ideas in order for him to trust that she can be a team player and companion in life.  I think her husband trusts that if something happens to him, she can find a way to pick up the slack and carry the family until he's back in commission.

It's interesting that her husband trusts her.  This doesn't mean that he has actual knowledge that she's capable of being what he needs her to be.  It means that he trusts in her and believes that she can be that woman.  She doesn't have to have gainful employment, a college degree, excellent homemaking skills, or networking skills.  No.   She has proven to him that if necessary, she can gain all those skills or will do what it takes for the sake of him and their family.  He believes in her because she has character and is dependable.

Wow!  What a challenge for every woman.  We must strive to be trustworthy teammates and not a liability to our husbands.